The Difference Between Democrats and Republicans (an anecdote recovered from my digital wastebasket)

One morning, in a prior life, I was dispatched to work on a campaign in Queens. Another “volunteer”, similarly dispatched from my office, had been sent out to buy bagels, and had returned with two dozen, all plain.  

 Peeved at the prospect of sinking my teeth into bland white bread without getting anything stuck between them, I questioned her about her choice. She said that she wasn’t sure what variety people would want, and therefore chose the lowest common denominator.

“That’s a Republican solution”, I snapped.

“And what, pray tell, would be the Democratic way?” she responded.

“Diversity", I snapped, "Buy a fucking assortment”.

Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Fri, 07/04/2008 - 2:05pm.

I agree.

Look, I don't really like salt or onion bagels, preferring egg and poppy myself, but, you know, if your aim is to feed a few people and make them somewhat happy, you have to be flexible.

That's why some folks who claim to be Democratic Party saviors in Brooklyn always confused me, since they seem to be so orthodox, not only in their beliefs, but in what they are willing to accept in others as well.


Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Sat, 07/05/2008 - 11:12am.

I disgree with the validity of your theory about the difference between Democrats and Republicans and bagels. In fact, the lowest common denominitor is the Democrat solution. Everything is equal (i.e., there is no individuality). Diversity is the Republican view. There are differences between people. Differences between men and women. The  same benefits to each individual is a Democrat solution, regardless of what they contribute.

Therefore, if a Democrat is true to his/her philosophy, then your co-worker did the Democrat thing when she got the same bagels for everyone. Equal Pay for Equal Work. 

  


Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Sun, 07/06/2008 - 2:05pm.

Actually, the Republican approach would have been to send her to the store with a specific list - having anticipated that different people would want different bagels.

If you knew any Republicans, you'd know that, and spare us another one of your adolescent rants.


Gatemouth's picture
Submitted by Gatemouth on Sun, 07/06/2008 - 6:18pm.
..the Republicans would have gotten Eglish muffins

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