Some things in Carl Paladino's meta-theme just don't make sense, especially to anybody who's ever served in the military. Carl claims that he's qualified to propose and run a work/hygiene camp for New York welfare recipients because he had experience at Fort Dix doing so while in the Army. This doesn't make sense. At all. So, Carl, could you please answer these three questions for everybody. (Especially since you're such a stickler for "the truth").

1. Why was an officer--that'd be you, Carl--actively engaged in instructing new recruits to groom themselves? This doesn't make sense, so how did this happen? Especially so since by your own timeline, you were already a lawyer--and presumably an officer in the Army JAG corps.

2. How did it happen that you only did 10 years of service, achieving an EZ-pass rank of Captain (O-3), and then just hung it up--thereby blowing a very nice military pension?

3. Finally, since Patton is your role model, would you likewise release your (unredacted) military records?