It's as true as the accusations leveled at me by Dumb and Dumber.

I originally had the word "sex" in the title, but, c'mon - is that the first thing you really want to read in the morning?

So - my first full day of being an "anti-semite". Eh.

I plan on just making fun of the whole thing. It's an accusation utterly created out of whole cloth. Please - if you recognize me, and wish to discuss it with me, just be sure to approach me with with the same level of discourse you wish returned. I'm actually a really good guy, if you've ever encountered me in person. I even helped someone with excessive baggage today. I do that all the time.

This whole thing has been blown out of proportion because of the shenanigans played by Howard "Gatemouth" Graubard and David "mole333" Michaelson. I want to steer this conversation back on point.

My big gripe, if it needs to have some sort of nomenclature, has to do with the unequal relationship Israel has with our government. This has NOTHING WHATSOEVER to do with Israel, in and of itself.

Let me explain.

This morning, I woke up, and turned on CBS 880, as I do every morning. I was greeted with the news that William Bratton was not selected in the final four contenders for the position of Metropolitan Commissioner of Police in the UK. (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/law-and-order/8687375/US-supercop-criticises-decision-to-stop-foreigners-applying-for-top-Met-job.html) The broadcaster cited that the home secretary was "unhappy" with the idea of a foreigner taking on the job of policing its citizens.

Are we tarring their policies because of this?

Don't we hear all of the time, from communities, how the police force isn't representative of the population?

Do we call them racist or "anti-semitic", because of that?

No - we do NOT.

So...back to that unequal relationship. I was asked if any other nation in the world had tried to offer the same junket, if I would have issue with those countries? My answer was that other countries CAN'T BLOODY DO IT.

Their PAC charters absolutely forbid any such trips, gifting or other such circumstances.

So, once again, comparing apples and watermelons...let's put this in easy terms.

You're in a cage match, and the extra stipulation is that you're going to have one hand tied behind your back.

You notice that the opposing wrestler is not having one hand tied behind his back - the whole thing is a sham.

You admonish the referee - he does a cursory check, and is satified with the illusion of the restraint.

The fight begins.

The opposing wrestler does a good show of keeping up the appearance of being restrained, as you are, while the referee is watching; however, when his attention is diverted, he takes each and every opportunity to whack at you.

It starts to take its toll.

You implore the referee to enforce that you are both on equal standing, but he doesn't do much, other than to take the opponent's word for it.

Remember the one rule of wrestling: if the referee doesn't see it, it didn't happen.

So - are you two telling me that I should just pretend that this unequal relationship doesn't exist?

There's more at stake here than a silly wrestling match, though - the future of America is as stake, and we need to be assured that everyone in a position to do either good or ill for our nation is focused on the former, and eschewing the latter.

I read an interesting piece in amNY yesterday - Jason Momoa is the newest actor to portray Robert E. Howard's Conan in film. Of course, the obligatory comparison to former governor Arlond Schwartzenegger is made, but then we hit an interesting train of thought:

amNY: Any thoughts on running for governor?

JM: I was going to go for the presidency since I'm, like, from this country.

I think I'm going to go see the new Conan movie.

Now, I'm going to make a confession.

I am a GLEE fan.

I ahd walked past some people discussing the show and whether it had jumped the shark yet, or not.

I had to suppress the urge to yell, "Michael Morrison is HOT!"

The show has a real fun dynamic, and Jane Lynch should have every jogging suit manufacturer on the knees in worship, vying for her endorsement.

The movie...maybe not such a great idea - especially the "3D" aspect. What tool thought that would be a selling point?

If I'm going to leave my residence to sit among others to enjoy Glee, I don't want to do it with those stupid glasses. I want to share in what should have been a fun moment, with a group of people who share that love of hamming it up and belting out tunes that have stood the test of time.

Please - NO MORE 3D crap.

Sully says no garbage facility near LaGuardia airport? I go with Sully.

Rick Perry slams the Fed? Ron Paul did that ages ago...but you say, "Ron Paul WHO"? There has been a concerted effort to keep him out of the daily discussion regarding challengers for the presidency.

There's NO WAY I let the utter faux-pas by Michele Bachmann go by without a mention. Just how divorced are you from information? I'm going to guess that you kept your campaign in the dark, and decided to let this gem fly unchecked from your head. Elvis Presley DIED 34 years ago on August 16 - it wasn't his birthday!

Now - how would I know that?

I used to listed to the Don and Mike Show when they were on the air on WNEW, along with Opie and Anthony and Ron and Fez. Don and Mike always celebrated his birth and his death, with anecdotes from past shows.

I think I'm done for now.

Let's have a good day, everyone.